If you see this woman...

SLAP HER!!!!

(Or should that be Slapper????)

Me and the eggheads

Probably one of the greatest moments of my life...

Are you an egghead? Part 2....

Sadly, it was not second time lucky.

In the second round I was up against a guy named Terry (I think his surname was Tovey) and he was so bloody good.... He knew the majority of his answers and I was shocked at how good he was (but not really, since this was the second round)

Once again, I ended up with 2 eggheads in the final (This time CJ and Daphne) but Terry managed to get all five of his questions right opposed to my four right answers.

However, as I said to Nazia and Caroline, the wonderful researchers, If I was going to lose, I Would have been glad to lose to Terry, as he was again a really nice guy.

I now pass all my support to Terry to get through to the finals and trounce all comers.

And once again, thanks to all the eggheads, and especially CJ and Daphne for being so friendly, and CJ, I will keep in touch.

Next stop, Anne bloody Robinson!

New Game

"you grab any book, go to page 123, find the fifth sentence, and blog it. Then tag five people"

My nearest book is "The encyclopaedia of classic 80's pop" by Daniel Blythe.


...but fans rate the 1995 comeback solo album "Duffy". He also...


Not as much fun as the songs one, as it's slightly less revealing, but hey ho!

Are you an egghead?

Well maybe? I'm certainly one step closer this morning after winning the first round match against Harold Wyber yesterday.

That's right, faithful reader, I've applied to become an Egghead. I've been through the audition process and yesterday I was called to TV Centre (Wood Lane) to film my first round.

I got to meet the eggheads including "the wonderful" Daphne Fowler. I was shaking like a leaf when she approached me, and I was genuinely nervous of meeting such quizzing royalty. Sir Christopher Hughes and I got chatting about trains and all of them were so wonderfully kind and polite. And as for CJ De Mooi, he is an extremely approachable and incredibly nice bloke.

Dermot Murnaghan was a consummate professional - Johnny Newspresenter. He turned up 3 minutes before we started filming and disappeared as quickly afterwards. Nowt special there!

So here's the rules:

Two potential eggheads go against each other over 5 rounds of questions picked from the themes used in regular eggheads.

Each round is 3 multiple choice questions long.

If you win a round, you get to choose an egghead to help you out in the final round.

At the end of the five rounds, the final head to head is played.

If you do not know the answer to a question, you can elect any of your accumulated eggheads to answer the question for you.

The winner goes through to the next round, the loser goes home.

Then we started filming - The rounds were in the following order:

First round - History - Round won - Chose Daphne as Egghead
Second round - Music - Round lost
Third round - Food and Drink - Round lost
Fourth round - Arts and Books - Round lost
Fifth round - Geography - Round won - Chose Chris as Egghead

The final round was five general knowledge questions. Chris answered my first one for me, then I got the following two questions right without calling on Daphne for help. Then question number four was about Hiram Maxim's flying machine at Blackpool Pleasure Beach - No problem there.

It all came down to Harold missing out a couple of questions, meaning I was too far out of reach for him to claw back.

I won!!!!! Made a very inappropriate comment about preferring childbirth to the game (of course they'll include this!) and Harold was sent home. Sorry H.

After i'd won the heat and the researchers scraped me up from the floor (I could have fainted!) Daph, Ceej and Chris all came over and said about how happy they were I'd gotten through. I was so relieved and exalted and humbled. It was amazing!

So now, i go throught to the quarter finals, filmining back at TVC tomorrow morning.

Wish me luck - Although this was not the plan, winnning the first round has left me believing I might just have a chance!

Paul's seen The Stolen Earth.....

.....and it's had quite a strange effect on him.

I received a text from him last night at 19:10pm saying the following:

Finished Stolen Earth. OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD. OH SWEET JESUS. HOLY CRAP. F*CKOLA ON A STICK.

Now what you need to know about Paul is that he doesn't normally write like this. It takes something extreme to get a response like this. And it's the fact that he's seen Stolen Earth that has led to this.

This has led me to start to shake in anticipation of this finale....

For Paul to react like this, it must be an amazing finale.

Now the waiting starts...

Oh and he did send me through a spoiler - Flydale North's most famous resident is returning...

SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

There are no words

You gotta love Joan Rivers....

Good old Joan Rivers.

I've always been a fan,
but it must have been an
unfamiliar booker who
decided to book her for
Loose Women yesterday.






If you're not familiar with the show, you need to know that:

• It's on prime time ITV1
• It's on at 1pm in the afternoon
• It's watched by a large percentage of viewers who would balk at the word "bugger"...

The outcome? Joanie thinks the show is prerecorded and calls Russell Crowe a "piece of fucking shit".

Whoops!

Cut to slack jaws, Lynda Bellingham hiding her head in her hands and Jackie Brambles courageously trying to change the subject (no doubt she had the producers screaming in here earpiece!)

Anyway, if you want to see what happened, Click HERE

Now, does anyone have the number for OfCom handy????


Now, does